Editors note: This article is FFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUULLL of images, blame Rob for the sheer number

Box
Before we start, I would just like to say that this was my favourite PS2 game.
Like… EVER.
I’m currently planning to invest in a new PS2 and the game once more, just so I can bask in how good it is once more.
Prepare for a detailed, screenshot-ridden review.
_
The Story
Wander and his horse, Agro, are on their way to the Forbidden Land with the body of his dearest love, Mono, who was executed by her people as she was believed to have a ‘cursed destiny’.
The hero and his steed soon arrive at a windy, narrow tunnel, which they proceed through without question. On the other side is a bridge that must be at least a mile long. It’s very narrow and very high up. The bridge meets a stone door which opens itself, giving way to Wander and Agro. They slowly creep through, down stone steps as the door shuts behind them.

They reach the base of the stairway, to find a huge room consisting of 16 idols, and a stone podium towards the front.

Wander lays Mono on the stone podium, and is hailed by a sentence made up of several voices at one time. The voices are named Dormin, and they exist within each of the 16 idols. They can grant life to any fallen being, presenting Wander’s reason for coming to them: he wants to bring Mono back to life. However, they can only do this if they are restored to life as the single Dormin.
Dormin tells of how Wander’s sword, which is a stolen artifact from his hometown, is the only sword that can get the job done: he must track down and defeat each of the idols’ alternate form, which are ‘Colossi’, monstrous giants that aimlessly wander around parts of the Forbidden Land. It will not be easy.
As each Colossus is defeated, their statued counterpart crumbles, and a 16th of Dormin is released. Once the 16th Colossus is defeated, Wander almost follows suit… But Dormin uses him as a host, and transforms him into the Dormin being.
Inhabitants of Mono’s home arrive, and attempt to take down Dormin… and fail. They retreat, taking the sword that Wander stole, and Dormin slowly tries to pursue them. The leader of the troup stops before the stone doors before the bridge, and he casts the sword down the stairway and into a pool of water at the base. Dormin then reduces down to a human form, mainly Wander with horns, and is sucked into the pool after the sword.
After lots of flashy lights, we see Mono wake up. She gets up and finds Agro, who was previously thought to be dead during the fight against the 16th colossus. Together they wander down the temple to the pool of water. The pool has evaporated, and in it’s place is a newborn baby… with horns.
We then cut to the secret garden, on the roof of the temple… and also the only place to have any true life left… And the fate of Mono and the baby Wander is left unknown.
Cue credits.
Gameplay
You have the entire forbidden land to explore, and you have 16 chances to do so, in between each hunt.
As Wander, you can ride Agro across the land to get to places really quickly, or sneak/walk/run to get to places really slowly.
Raising the sword allows you to shine a beacon, which focuses when you face the direction of the next colossus to defeat (of course, it’s useless where there isn’t any sunlight). You perform simple attacks with it, a slice when stationary, a strong thrust downwards, and a leaping strike downwards. You also have a bow and arrow, which shoots further the longer you aim for.
There are fruit trees around the land, and you can only shoot down the fruits with the bow. As you eat the fruit, your health increases. Your health does increase itself, however it is slower that way.
You also have a stamina circle, which goes down the longer you hang on to something, hold your breath under water, or when you aim the bow. Stamina can be increased by default, the same with the health, OR you can hunt down and kill little black lizards. The ones with white tails will improve your stamina, normal lizards won’t.
As for defeating the Colossi, each of the 16 monstrosities have a unique way of getting to their weak spot. The creatures are a mix of buildings and flesh, so their are parts of them which Wander can actually stand on, like a building. You can grab onto the hair (or in some cases, grass) of some Colossi, and hang on for dear life as the beast tries to shake you off. Once it stops moving, you have your chance to stab it in the weak spot.
To save giving too much away, I’m not going through the gameplay of each colossi, but what I will do is present all the different colossi, in order and with their names, right here in some screenshots. The sheer size and nature of them blew me away. Each individual colossus is unique, there is not a single similarity between any of them.
Colossus #1

Colossus #2

Colossus #3

Colossus #4

Colossus #5

Colossus #6

Colossus #7
It was hard to find a decent in-game shot of this one. Here’s the best I could find:

Colossus #8

Colossus #9

Colossus #10

Colossus #11

Colossus #12

Colossus #13

Colossus #14

Colossus #15

Colossus #16
No way.
Too epic.
Wanna see #16? Play the game. It’ll be worth it. And you’ll want to play it again, just to see if you can do things better/different next time. I know I did.
Once you complete the game once, you unlock a challenge mode. The colossi are a tad harder to defeat, you take more damage and use more stamina.
Going back to a previously defeated colossus enables you to play Reminiscence mode. Nothing special, it just lets you pwn that colossus once more.
You also unlock time trial runs. If you ‘pray’ at a colossus idol, you can try to defeat that colossus within the time limit. For every 2 you defeat within the given time, you get a bonus item!
Bonus Content
If you complete the game the first time round, holding Square at the title screen will give you a brown Agro.
To unlock the Time Attack and Hard mode, you must watch the end credits all the way through, and then save the game.
As you defeat Colossi in NORMAL Time Attack mode, you unlock the following:
Whistling Arrow Defeat 2 Colossi in Time Attack mode. (Distracts a Colossi)
Cloak of Force Defeat 4 Colossi in Time Attack mode. (Enhances strength)
Mask of Strength Defeat 6 Colossi in Time Attack mode. (” “)
Lizard Detection Stone Defeat 8 Colossi in Time Attack mode. (Shows lizards nearby)
Fruit Tree Map Defeat 10 Colossi in Time Attack mode. (Shows fruit trees)
Mask of Power Defeat 12 Colossi in Time Attack mode. (Inflict greater wounds)
Cloak of Deception Defeat 14 Colossi in Time Attack mode. (Become invisible)
Flash Arrow Defeat all Colossi in Time Attack mode. (Explosive arrows)
Normal Time Attack mode is done when you play the game a second time under Normal difficulty.
So naturally, Hard mode difficulty enables you to play Hard Time Attack!
Harpoon of Thunder Defeat 2 Colossi in Hard Time Attack Mode. (Spear)
Sword of the Sun Defeat 4 Colossi in Hard Time Attack Mode. (Use beacon everywhere)
Fruit Tree Map Defeat 6 Colossi in Hard Time Attack Mode.
Shaman’s Cloak Defeat 8 Colossi in Hard Time Attack Mode. (Reduces damage taken)
Lizard Detection Stone Defeat 10 Colossi in Hard Time Attack Mode.
Shaman’s Mask Defeat 12 Colossi in Hard Time Attack Mode. (Reduces damage taken)
Cloth of Desperation Defeat 14 Colossi in Hard Time Attack Mode. (Parachute)
Queen’s Sword Defeat 16 Colossi in Hard Time Attack Mode. (The sword from Ico)
With a LOT of stamina, a LOT of skill and preferably that unlockable parachute, you can reach the Secret Garden that Mono somehow gets to at the end of the game. There are more fruit trees up here, and a terrific view of the land. Round the back, you can reach the outer side of the stone doorway, and also the mile-long bridge. Of course, Agro can’t follow you up there, so you have to walk it. It takes a loooong time in the gaming world.
Another way to get to the Secret Garden is to beat the game 4 times.
Finally, if you have a save game of Ico on your memory card, Agro’s white symbol on his forehead will become the ‘I’ of the Ico logo.
Verdict
:|
OVER 9,000!!!!/10
THIS.
GAME.
KICKS.
-ASS-.
If you play this game and do not get some form of enjoyment out of it, there is something SERIOUSLY wrong with you! If anything, people will play this game for its detail or for the behaviour of the colossi. Also, it’s different to have a game where the protagonist is the only sentient being in the WHOLE game! Except perhaps Agro or Mono (but she’s dead. Lol).
This game is Gandalf vs. the Balrog. Only, Wander is smaller than Gandalf and going up against foes two times bigger than a Balrog.
This has been Rob, and this has been my review of Shadow of the Colossus for PlayStation 2.
<3